raw.

what a day.

my cousin passed away a week today.

canNOT believe it.  he would have been 40 next month.

but what a day of celebration.  of who he was in life.

and what he meant to everyone.  so cool!

my hub and I read at his funeral today.

what an honor it was to be invited to read…

whoa.

I could not mask the pre-nerves.

I had all ready lost it three times (maybe more?) before it was our turn.  while watching the photos cycle through the slide show of his life.  and seeing his body brought into the church.

how was I going to get the words out without convulsing into tears?

I had all ready tripped going up the steps for our instructions.  the horror of falling in front of everyone settled in.

so I sat in the pew with my heart pumping.  blood pressure off the charts.

and at some point, I somehow remembered what to do.

I breathed. and breathed again.  and again.  and focused on my cousin.  I swear, he was there.

moments before it was our turn.  my tears ceased.

and my mind turned to my best friend.

who always manages to keep it together when called upon by others.  she gave me the courage to walk calmly up to the pulpit.

and so I did.  and kept it together.  looking directly at his parents…my aunt and uncle. his brother. and then his wife.  and two boys.  and read clearly and loudly.

today was a raw day.

God bless, you.

my Doctor-Doctor cousin.

you did everything you were supposed to do.  and what a lesson that is for the rest of us!

you did it.

xoxo

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4 thoughts on “raw.

  1. Two beautifully written posts in a row. Damian clearly was and will continue to be very loved and admired by the many people he touched. He would be SO proud of you for reading yesterday in his honor! And he’ll continue to be a huge inspiration to you going forward, which is an incredible legacy to leave behind. xo

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