woke up this morning at a scheduled 4:30. in the AM folks.
showered the night before. in bed by 8:30 in the PM for a good eight hours of sleep.
annoyingly, was awakened at 1AM by my unhelpful sleep thoughts.
I have the 30 mile MS Ride tomorrow!
yikes. so not ready for this!
after slowly falling asleep an hour later…only to awaken to the gentle strumming of a harp.
I have to go to work now?
guess again, dear.
no, instead the hub and two super good friends are doing the MS Ride (second time for the hub and me)…or Ride MS which I suppose is its official title…
yikes. fear began to grip. again.
I have NOT been doing the training 30 miles deserves.
the most the hub and I have biked is 15 miles.
really? and my legs are still somewhat weak after last year’s episode that carried on for months.
but, we rolled out of bed.
and I blogged.
while having my coffee and two gluten-free flax laden waffles. hub walked the doggy. (geessh…do I love this man!!)
and then we hit the rainy roads.
sidebar>;>;>;the fear had started to settle in Friday.
>;I asked the captain of my work team on Friday to please do something about the forecast rain today.
>;whatever he did, it worked. it only rained throughout the car ride down to San Diego.
and we arrived in San Diego. feeling more jazzed than in the super-early morning hours. organized. kinda raring to go. was I fooling myself?
…only to find out that the ride had been delayed due to a triathlon in San Diego.
all my energy was released in that exact moment.
yay! we (no I) don’t have to endure 30 miles!!?
but then after an hour, we started to roll.
and made a split second decision after a minor uphill climb followed down around Mission Bay: to turn left for 30 miles or turn right for 15.
after pleading with my hub before we rolled…we knew which way were going to go…
“I would really prefer to do the 15…what do you think?”
“baby, whatever you want to do.”
I looked to my team-mates.
“you’re call,” they responded…
I felt instantly guilty. (they are were all in super shape and ready to roll!)
“ummm…I kinda want to just do the 15, but you guys go ahead…” I muttered, trailing off at the end…unsure anyone heard that last bit.
still feeling guilty. I made the call again when it came to the final decision point. left or right.
I chose right. and almost fell off my bike in the process.
tonight, I recall the moment in time, when my true self, said to me, no, you’re not ready to do this…don’t push it. it’s okay.
even the 15 miles was HARD! and even after we ended up going the wrong way…(the route had to be re-mapped; a few arrows were missed)…
so we ended up only riding ten miles (!).
I have done ten miles – no problem! easy-peasy.
but unfortunately, today, my body was not cooperating.
so annoying! I kept falling behind my team…but they kept looking back to check to make sure I hadn’t ended up in the bay.
thank you!! eegads.
silly me. I committed to doing 100 next year.
when I could barely do ten today. my legs just didn’t want to line up with what my mind had envisioned for them.
don’t you MS peeps agree – it’s SO frickin’ frustrating when our bodies just want to have a mind of their own??
we’ll see how it goes…I said to my hub tonight, that I won’t decide until 2013.
tomorrow is Monday. argh!
actually, returning to work is more appealing that getting back on a bike! AND, I know I will sleep tonight. 🙂
hope you peeps had a great weekend!